For him—

Not even science can explain how she fell in love with him..

Kept her wondering whether it was right or true?

Then he said, “Sorry, got real busy.”

And that’s when she knew.. that he is no longer interested. “If he was, he’d find time”, is what she thought.

Slowly, she realized that must be the end.

The end—

The end of something that barely even started.

For her, love isn’t something that you should be sorry for. For all she know, the kind of love she felt in that kind of situation is a mere illusion.

After all, there is no reason for her to get depressed over a feeling she felt in that state.

PS: As I was writing this, Wonderwall by Oasis came in on shuffle~~!! (ô^ô)

Grad school shenanigans

Onto the last two weeks of this semester!! I’ve suffered enough already yet the amount of research papers, manuscript, seminar, problem sets and project proposal I have to write and prepare for never ends.

Times like this, I can’t help but ask myself, “Are you still happy with the path you’ve chosen?”. After finishing my master’s degree (hopefully by 2021!!!), what will I do next? Should I do PhD right after I graduated or should I take a gap year and do some soul-searching? Right now, the only thing I could do is literature search for my research papers. This is not the right time to think about these things.

Well, what can a girl who can’t sleep do? Of course, she writes.

PS: I did Pixel laser resurfacing like two days ago and my skin looks so bad that I can’t even go out. Hoping that this is definitely worth it.

No need for a title

This would be the last time I am going to talk about the idea of falling in love… never shall you hear anything from me ever again.

It was you who approached me unexpectedly. All you had to do was gain my trust. And you did, unfortunately. But I tried my hardest to keep all these feelings inside me as I am slowly falling for you. I don’t know why, I just did. When I did, it was you who slowly fade away. I wanted to ask you but I’d rather not, I can’t let myself be deemed weak. Maybe somewhere inside me, I know why it happened. I am smart enough to figure this one out. Still, I must tell you that it really hurts 🙂

Look at what you’ve done to me. I can’t get you out of my head but I have to! I won’t let my grades be affected by something as trivial as this. I never told anyone about this and now, I am sufferring alone with no one to share this pain with.

But I will be okay.

May this serve as a lesson to my naive self once again, to never fall for any guy again. And to focus on what I do best, studying. I’d study ’till my hearts content and may all these thoughts I have of you be replaced with academic stuff.

You who mean nothing to me once,

and you, who would mean nothing to me… forever.

[I just had to let this out of my mind. Forgive me for this rant.]

Note to self

Be strong, my heart.

Never fall for those empty words and promises. Every guy will treat you the way you wanted to be treated when he’s still trying to earn your trust.

Never. Ever. Fall. For. Those. Words.

Never.

Solitude is a lot better than mending a broken heart. Remember that.

[ACT 274] Skip beat!

So does anybody out there still reads this manga? Damn it. This manga has been taking away years of my life already!

Damn it.

How many chapters before this confession takes place, huh? C’mon!!!!! All I ever wanted was for those two to get their crap together and resolve their own dang issues and finally be together!!! o(>ω<)o but I guess that is still too far from happening considering Kyouko is still underage in this arc. More or less 10-12 chapters!!??? SOOOO, DO I HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER YEAR FOR THIS!!??????)

No lies.

No cover ups.

No Kuon/Corn kind of confession.

Hoping for an all-out Ren-Kuon-Corn all rolled into one confession. Damn it. Just tell her man!!!! Have some balls!!!!!!!!!!

Though this arc’s title Impending Doom is shrouded with mystery and— feelin’ quite skeptic about this.

PS: The level of my cortisol right now is at its highest peak (シ_ _)シ

PPS: I still managed to vent out my frustrations regarding this manga!!! Though I am already stressed enough with my paper that is due tomorrow.

Letter No. 3

I can’t focus on my studies and research works.

Something is bothering me yet I don’t know what exactly it is. My heart is so heavy but my face is as blank as a paper. Or maybe I know what bothers me, I just don’t want to acknowledge it.

I don’t know.

This is why I never want to experience these stupid mundane feelings— it destroys your sanity in an instant.